Can we say, I am 100% committed to complete my  training or my certification on …?

People may say: I lost 8 months on it and I am not sure when I will be done with it, as I have other responsibilities in life, but despite those responsibilities I am committed to finish one of these days.

 

I think on this case, the person has the passion for the training, understand that is important for him/her; but how can you say you are committed if you do not understand what are you committing to?

 

As I believe, commit, comes from putting something together (com-together + mittere to put). It means that you need to understand or know that parts to keep everything together.

On this case, the parts are the challenges and risks that you are willing to take and be able to complete your commitment, therefore you can not commit to something if you do know what are you committing to (the components of it).

 

In Coaching, the help that the coach brings into the process is critical on this aspect. It helps the client in understanding his real desires, his goals and the commitment to achieve it.

The coach helps also by getting the client into action to reach his or her goal.

Xavier C Villalobos

Reflecting in our reading of Truth vs. Fraud and the reference to Don Miguel Ruiz book, The Four agreements.

At this instance, Truth is about being authentic with ourselves. I believe, this is about being fully committed to our values, specially the value of Integrity. We cannot be seen as honest and living a truthful life, if we cannot be faithful and committed with ourselves. This is what Don Miguel offer with the 4 agreements:

1.- Be Impeccable with your word; Speak only the truth and say what you mean. do not use your word against yourself or other (gossips).

2.- Don‘t take anything personally; what other people do and say is what they are and how they feel; It is their projection is not about us. But how we feel and the way we see things is our internal projection. Being unaffected by the actions of others we will avoid unnecessary suffering.

3. Don‘t make assumptions; be clear and avoid judging others when we can clarify other’s words, action and intentions and this way avoid misunderstanding and unneeded life complexity or drama.  When we make assumptions we are creating potential problems. With clear communications all relationship will improve.

4. Always do your best; We are not always in the same state of mind or physical condition as we change but our intent would be to do the best on every occasion, this way we will feel in peace with ourselves as we take every action as something we enjoy and not waiting for any reward; they will come but we are not attached to any expectation.

This is about being authentic with ourselves. This way, we feel and act always truthfully.

Reflection on perception of truth

Think about your perception of truth. What are the behaviors that you see of someone living by the truth?

I see self-confidence; see someone in perfect harmony (by being truthful to him /herself).

This is about living without of dear. Is easier to say then do.

But this is about, knowing ourselves better, accepting that we can fail once in a while, but learning form those experiences and recognize that reality or truth, we will a bit more be free of self imposed frustrations.

I found the concepts on the book Leadership and Self-Deception, very interesting which is similar to my thoughts above but even more dramatic due to the fact that it goes beyond not recognizing who we are but worse, pretending being straightforward with ourselves but living in a fraud and we create, what they call, self-betrayal and with that we change everything around us by a distorted reality (or in the box)

 

Xavier C. Villalobos

Responding is reflective, is being present, we are aware of our own feelings and thoughts and those of our interlocutor, therefore we choose our response.

Reacting is a non-thoughtful behavior, conditioning response. The conditioned response is the learned response to the previously neutral stimulus.

Although, both behaviors; Responding and Reacting, could bring a positive or negative response.

Routine -> Conditioning -> Reacting

View/Perceiving-> Thinking-> Thoughts -> Chosen behavior- > Responding

I would like to summarized similarly as shared in the class today

Reacting is ME.  My instinctive and learned “answer” or behavior.

My defensive “feedback” to the situation or person.

Responding is YOU and ME.

MY VIEW to your input thinking in US and not in ME alone.

This is a more thoughtful answer to the situation or to the person.

 

Xavier Villalobos